dumb dumb udmb

I've been remembering to do this every so often to tell all of my harrowing tales, but neglecting to write the entertaining stupid things my friends and I say and do. For example, at Jess' party, I was heard to say, "if any ninja turtle were going to swear, it would be Raphael. He'd be like, 'fuck!'. It would be awesome,". Me and Adam found it pretty funny, of course nobody else did.

Then the next day, me and Adam were considering eating something, and we wanted to have food without expending much effort. I got a bowl of Mini-Wheats, because we had a vast stockpile of them. Then Adam got up, and I heard a loud bang noise before he poured his wheats. So I asked, "Are you pouring a huge popcorn bowl full of Mini-Wheats?", and he replied, "no," then started laughing a little.

"So... what's so funny?"
"I'm pouring a huge popcorn bowl full of Mini-Wheats."

Also, and I have no idea why I remembered this, but there was this funny incident back in OAC in my Cisco class (4 years ago now). Okay, there were many, but this is the one I'll recount.

The class was about 10 people, all guys, all computer nerds, so we goofed off all the time. One day we had a supply teacher, and he was kind of stern so we were doing work and I believe the regular teacher was mad at us so we wanted to leave a good impression. Me and Geekman usually sat at the front of the room.

The teacher started looking at all the mice in the classroom, and we were wondering what he was doing. He told us there were reports of the balls being taken out of the mice in the classroom. He went on and on like a Saturday Night Live joke...

"I heard from Mr. Gaddas that the balls were being taken from the mice. They said they were trying to find a way to keep the students from snatching the balls of the mice, but I don't think they can do that. Instead, they have to check the mice for balls, otherwise we'll eventually end up with a lot of useless mice with no balls."

It's this little old man with a strange accent, and of course we all think he has no idea that he's freakin' hilarious. I was choking back my laughter so I wouldn't get in trouble. He just kept going on about people "grabbing mouse balls". Eventually I just put my head down behind my monitor and started laughing, and I looked backwards under my arm and saw, in the row behind me, Andrew Meyer just sitting there, completely redfaced from laughing, and looking at me.

I realized that although what the teacher was saying was funny, he was laughing at me for being in this rediculous situation. So then the teacher finishes off his speech about mouse balls...

"...and I wanted to ask Mr. Gaddas how else we could keep the mice from being castrated."

And the entire room just had this immense release -- I was laughing so hard. Oh boy. Of course, yes, the teacher realized he was torturing us the entire time and it ended up that he'd been joking about the mouse balls all along.

Seriously, I don't really remember why that came to mind recently. I guess I was thinking about high school or something. It's one of my favourite stories and never made it into a journal before, so I guess it's nice to write for sometime when I'm senile.

I guess now in high school, they probably have mostly optical mice. Actually, maybe I was thinking about it because I'm working at a schoolboard call centre.

It's really boring here. I keep trying to find websites to entertain myself, but half of them fail because of the flawed connection here. So, one thing I do is write more emails. Another thing I started doing was posting on GameFAQs message boards, which I've very seldom done in the past. There, I go by the name FreshFeeling.

The other day, I decided I wanted to read the board about Final Fantasy VI because they used to have cool riddles, quizzes, and questions about the algorithms and mechanics of this classic game. So I go there and there's a topic that says, "call me dump". Here's the first post:

"mmm lol i finish the game like 5 time and i dont know what do : stamina bat.power vigor did sum1 can help me? YHEA IM BUMP dont need to say sit ;P" - wirlspool

It's just... awesome.
I wonder about the legality of copying a stranger's message board post, and yet, somehow, I don't feel especially threatened having done it. The responses, too, are just amazing.

Again and again, I challenge myself to see what the stupidest thing I can write about in an online journal is, and today I think I've finally reached a zenith. But that's okay, because seriously, it's the middle of the afternoon and I've got 3 calls in 45 minutes.

The day before last, I got a little yellow envelope from a music store in New York. I was pretty confused at first, and then thought it might be some kind of promotion I'd absentmindedly signed up for or some nonsense. As I was opening it, I remembered that my friend Sean Giles (a former Squarevillian) in Texas told me he was going to get me a Christmas present.

We were talking about the demotivator posters at despair.com, because he got them for two other former Squarevillians. I was looking and thought mistakes was funniest. I remembered that he'd also tried to tell me about a band I should listen to recently, and I wasn't really listening. Partially because I had exams, and partially because, fuck, nobody honestly listens when someone else says, "Hey, you should listen to this!".

I opened the envelope and it was a CD by PJ Harvey, a band that sounded familar but I'd never listened to. I haven't seen Sean Giles online yet to see if this was his doing, nor have I checked my logs with him to see if that was the band he told me about. Nor have I actually listened to the CD yet. :P

Anyways, it's cool. Knowing someone you haven't met wants to give you free shit for reasons that don't seem corporate (or even sexual, I think) is awesome. In the past, he recommended the band Apartment 26 to me, who I ended up liking quite a bit. I may trust his judgement.

The following people have pushed bands that I didn't think I'd like at first, and ended up liking a lot:

Andrew Uchenick: Nine Inch Nails, MDFMK, A Perfect Circle, Tool
Mandy Chapman: Ben Folds Five, Poe, Portishead
Tyler Speakman: Eels, Boy Sets Fire, Muse, Glueleg
Josh Grant: Sneaker Pimps, System of a Down
Sean Giles: Apartment 26

Most other good stuff I encountered on my own. Of course, even some of those above have fallen out of disuse. The new APC album is pretty bad (in my opinion) and that doesn't really bother me that much.

Okay, a lady just called to ask the name of the student that can shovel her driveway. That's... pretty cool.